I will put clean, fresh sheets on my bed every 4 or 5 days.
I won’t make my bed unless company is coming over.

I will always have nail polish on my toes.
I won’t tend to my cuticles on a regular basis.

I will binge-watch TV shows on Netflix like it’s my job.
I won’t, under any circumstances, watch live TV with commercials. Can. Not. Deal.

I will send birthday cards to my siblings, in-laws, nieces and nephews.
I won’t pretend I can do this without Google calendar and it’s 10-day reminder email.

I will work a few extra hours in the office to finish up a project.
I won’t bring work home.

I will spend my entire lunch break reading a new book.
I won’t skip taking a lunch break, and only rarely will I take less than an hour to myself midday.

I will give up sugars and baked goods and carby pastas for weeks at a time.
I won’t give up cheese.

I will kill 95% of my houseplants, despite my best intentions.
I won’t forget to buy myself some grocery store flowers, just because.

I will leave untidy piles around my apartment for up to several weeks.
I won’t always wash the dishes before I go to bed. (12 years without a dishwasher!)

I will read as much non-fiction as I can get my hands on.
I won’t read YA fiction unless it comes very highly recommended by someone that I not only trust, but who deeply understands the kind of books I like.

I will happily have you over for dinner, or invite a dozen people to a party on a moment’s notice.
I won’t dust before you come over because I *hate* dusting with the hate of ten million haters.

What about you? What will you? What won’t you?