[awkward, embarrassed silence]
Um, how’ve you been? How’s things? How’s your Mom/sweetheart/puppy?
Oh good. Cool. Cool cool cool. Uh, yeah…same…?
I’ve been staring at this blank page for weeks trying to will myself to fill it up with something haunting and beautiful, or witty and funny, or angry and therapeutic. And all I can come up with is “Hello. Hi.” I guess sometimes that’s really the best place to start, sometimes it’s the only place to start.
A blank page is truly the best and most exciting thing about writing, and also the most terrifying.
Exciting and terrifying; such a killer combo.
I know it’s not New Year’s Resolutions time around the Internets, but let’s just pretend that I’m fashionably late to that particular party, okay>? I decided that my mantra for 2018 will be about self care, about putting my needs and my concerns first. I’m not necessarily talking about bath bombs and spa retreats (although I wouldn’t run away from either of those things), but about giving myself realistic goals and expectations, and saying “No” to everything else. Basically, if I am not 95% HELL YES! on any given decision, my answer will be “No,” “No, thank you,” or possibly “Get the hell out.” I’m absolutely done with half-assing anything and feeling guilty about it, I’ve been practicing saying “no” (I still kind of suck at it, but I’m trying) and I’ve been careful about what I say yes to. This will not be an easy lesson for me to learn, but I am convinced it’s one I desperately need. I also need to practice letting go of unnecessary feelings of guilt, which is something I’ve been perfecting holding on to for my whole damn life. So, let’s perhaps only expect baby steps in that department, mmmmkay?
Exciting and terrifying. Saying yes to the things that will really matter, and saying no to a lot of things that may also matter but, ultimately, will matter less.
I think that’s it for now. Apparently, I also need to practice writing blog posts? I mean, I legit had to do a gmail search to remember how/where to log on to even write a post. I’ve missed this space; the more time went by, the more I missed it. This little corner of the internet is, for me, a HELL YES! Not a HELL YES! EVERYDAY! HELL YES! because I just do not have that kind of bandwidth anymore (or ever), but something in-between “everyday” and “one post every six months.” Yes, let’s shoot for that.
Also? I’ve missed you. I’m not even going to look at my feed reader (it’s been months, I need to just open it, clear all news posts, and start over), so please leave me a link of whatever has been going on in your life lately, something you’re proud of, something that was really hard, something hilarious, a trip, a recipe, a darling picture of your kid/cat. I’m here. And I’m not going to be going away anytime soon.
Hiii. I missed you. Glad you’re writing again.
Hi friend!!! I’m glad I’m writing again too, I really have missed this space and all the connections and catch-up with friends that stem from it.
Oh HAI! Glad you are blogging again. I’m trying to get back in the habit too. Yay for blogs!
Yay for blogs indeed!!! I’m glad to be back (and relieved to have that first post done and over with, whew!)
Welcome back! I read something in the book Essentialism (a great read!) a little while ago and it’s stuck with me: “If it’s not a clear yes, it’s a no.”
I bought a house, I got a cat, I’m feeling overwhelmed and frustrated by all of the genuinely urgent housekeeping type tasks that fill my days at work right now, but I know that things will get more manageable once this month is over. I also left cookies out of my lunch today in an effort to reduce my sugar consumption but I’m totally kicking myself for that decision because I need to stress eat! (And obviously I’m avoiding work right now because I’m reading blogs.)
YES! That’s the same book I read! I really would like to sit down and re-read it, there was SO much good stuff in there, and I think it might be worth an annual re-read, to be honest.
YOU’RE BAAAAACK! And with all the wisdom and stuff too! Never leave the internets, please and thank you.
Back-ish, wise-ish. It’s good to feel like I’m home. 🙂
Missed your writing and I’m glad to hear that you are back!
I went to TX to help with disaster relief, we had to put down my dog, the holidays kicked my ass, and we just got back from a trip to CA. We’ve been busy.
I will need to hunt for the disaster relief post, that is so awesome!
And I’m so sorry to hear about your dog, what a heartbreak.
I was wondering where you’ve been. Glad you’re back. Looking forward to at least one post from you in the next six months. Haha.
Yes, if I can do three a year I’ll be SET!
(Real talk: goal is 3x per month, which isn’t very much, but if that’s my own *minimum* goal, anything above that is all sorts of winning.)
I was so giddy to see that you had posted again!! I have missed reading your corner of the internet. Love you!
Awwww, I’m so thrilled that you still check in on me! I pinky swear I won’t go away that long again!
HI! If you could show me how to find the time/motivation to blog again as well, that would be superb! 😀 Glad to see you back around these parts.
Ooouufff, I honestly am unsure if I have either time OR real motivation…but I’m trying to pretend as HARD AS I CAN that I do.
I’m in the same boat as you! Haven’t really written since… October? Sigh. Welcome back!
I want to say something (sort of pithy) like “starting again is the hardest part” but that’s just not true. It’s a consistent effort of regular posting and regular writing, and sometimes I am great at that, and other times I super suck at it. Shrug. Lowering my expectations, lol.